Cutmoon: A term coined by my son when he was two.

http://www.zefrank.com/youngmenowme/

Young Me / Now Me

2010-02-22T12:42:00.001-08:00

A zefrank joint:

Awesome!

A short love story.

2010-01-27T06:08:00.001-08:00

A man and a woman who had never met before, but who were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a trans-continental train.
Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the upper berth and she in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying... "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea", she replied. "Just for tonight... let's pretend that we're married."
"'Wow!... That's a great idea!", he exclaimed.
"Good," she replied... "Get your own f*cking blanket."
After a moment of silence...
He farted.

Are You Happy?

2009-09-18T11:48:00.001-07:00

Breaking & Popping with Alfonso

2009-08-27T13:55:00.001-07:00

Launch your boat properly

2009-08-25T07:44:00.001-07:00

Dude just bought a new boat and decided to take her for the maiden voyage.

This was his first boat and he wasn't quite sure of the exact procedures for launching it off a ramp, but figured it couldn't be too hard.

He consulted his local boat dealer for advice, but all they said was "don’t let the trailer get too deep in the water".

Well... he didn't know what they meant by that as he could barely get the trailer in the water at all!

Here's a picture:

10 Twittoons

2009-08-18T17:14:00.001-07:00

AC/DC Moncton Highlights

2009-08-07T08:52:00.001-07:00

Awesome Show. These videos do not do justice to what it was like to be in the middle of 70,000 people.

The 80's song

2009-08-05T10:06:00.001-07:00

Should you FWD that email?

2009-08-04T08:27:00.001-07:00

Great Inventions

2009-07-10T06:16:00.001-07:00

wackawackawackawacka...

2009-06-26T07:56:00.001-07:00

R.I.P.M.J.

2009-06-26T07:35:00.001-07:00

Glasses on...

Star Wars done right.

2009-06-22T17:44:00.001-07:00

Lucas should have had these writers help with the prequels. Coulda been so much better.

Here's what went wrong with George Lucas

2009-06-17T09:23:00.001-07:00

10 Excellent Recut Movie Trailers

2009-06-16T14:03:00.001-07:00

Misery

Mrs. Doubtfire

Top Gun

The Shining

Dumb & Dumber

Silence of the Lambs

Home Alone

Toy Story

Mary Poppins

Death Metal Cockatoo

2009-06-11T10:58:00.001-07:00

Good Night Saigon, by Will Ferrell

2009-06-09T11:20:00.001-07:00

Posted via web from Rich's Goulash

Classic Cosby.

2009-06-09T09:23:00.001-07:00

Timely for me:

Vince. The Remix.

2009-06-03T14:21:00.001-07:00

Mr. ShamWow and his old Slap Chop spot have been recut and it's fantastic.

Great editing and use of the auto-tune voice modulator.

Too bad Vince isn't exactly a straight-shooter.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0327092sham1.html

Maybe this viral fame will get him back on track...

The Herculoids.

2009-06-03T13:46:00.001-07:00

This is one of those childhood favourites, that I had totally forgotten about. Used to love watching and drawing these guys. Wouldn't it be cool if they resurrected them and made a modern live action movie?

http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=Bone+Yard+Tucson,+Arizona&sll=32.194501,-110.87866&sspn=0.153548,0.244617&ie=UTF8&ll=32.152053,-110.83246&spn=0.022709,0.04667&t=h&z=16

The Bone Yard

2009-06-02T11:15:00.001-07:00

Pictures of the Bone Yard near Davis Mountain Air Force Base in Tucson, Arizona Remember - Each one of these babies had multimillion dollar price tags!

Weekly tours of the bone yard are still given through the Tucson Air Museum.

Of course the important thing to remember is that they are all capable of being returned to service if the need ever arises.

Technically, this is the world's third largest air force.

Link to the Bone Yard on Google Maps:

Untitled

2009-06-02T06:07:00.001-07:00

Check out this video on YouTube:

Star Wars Toaster?

2009-05-15T14:53:00.001-07:00

I must have one! #geek

http://shop.starwars.com/catalog/product.xml?product_sku=SWLFLTOAST&rid=SWHBTOAST

40 Inspirational Speeches in 2 Minutes.

2009-05-07T11:36:00.001-07:00

From now on, anytime I'm feeling down, I'm watching this:

(rt @stephenbrander)

I do the same thing with my printer.

2009-05-04T16:23:00.001-07:00

Click here to download:

printer.wmv (3114 KB)

Rhett & Link and iPhone Trombone

2009-05-01T12:04:00.001-07:00

These guys are awesome.

@rhettmc
@linklamont

Late Late Comedy Gold.

2009-04-24T11:57:00.001-07:00

I always liked Conan best, but with him gone (Fallon blows) I've migrated over to Craig Ferguson... He hasn't disappointed. Here's an example.

How Star Wars changed the world

2009-04-21T16:21:00.001-07:00

Amazing Tire Sculptures

2009-04-14T14:22:00.001-07:00

$42.69 Fast Food Folk Song

2009-04-14T08:22:00.001-07:00

From now on, I'm singing all my drive-thru orders.

Japan has the best commercials

2009-04-09T08:53:00.001-07:00

Via: http://designyoutrust.com/2009/03/30/snow-white-macbook/

Snow White Macbook

2009-03-31T08:15:00.001-07:00

True Friendship

2009-03-30T06:06:00.001-07:00

Click here to download:

The_Animal_Odd_Couple.WMV (4324 KB)

Riverview Rebels & the Stanley Cup!

2009-03-26T20:07:00.001-07:00

Who knew that this would be the trophy we'd be posing with after winning our division this year!

We had an official team pic taken too. I'll post it as soon as I get it.

GO REBELS!

Riverview Rebels & the Stanley Cup!

2009-03-26T19:48:00.001-07:00

Who knew that this would be the trophy we'd be posing with after winning our division this year!

We had an official team pic taken too. I'll post it as soon as I get it.

GO REBELS!

Beware of the Flasher

2009-03-20T09:45:00.001-07:00

The Good ol' Days

2009-02-16T12:00:00.001-08:00

And they want to ban fighting in the NHL....

Important Health Alert

2009-02-12T08:47:00.001-08:00

The Center for Disease Control has issued a medical alert about a highly contagious, potentially dangerous virus that is transmitted orally, by hand, and even electronically.

This virus is called Weekly Overload Recreational Killer (WORK).

If you receive WORK from your boss, any of your colleagues or anyone else via any means whatsoever - DO NOT TOUCH IT!!!

This virus will wipe out your private life entirely. If you should come into contact with WORK you should immediately leave the premises.

Take two good friends to the nearest liquor store and purchase one or both of the antidotes - Work Isolating Neutralizer Extract (WINE) and Bothersome Employer Elimination Rebooter (BEER).

Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

You should immediately forward this medical alert to five friends.

If you do not have five friends, you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.

Kinky

2009-02-04T09:27:00.001-08:00

Sumo skier

2009-01-31T10:23:00.001-08:00

Muppet Death Metal

2009-01-31T09:55:00.001-08:00

Intense.

FREE!

2009-01-29T08:27:00.001-08:00

I want to be just like Mommy

2009-01-29T08:22:00.001-08:00

Dear Mrs. Jones,
I wish to clarify that I am not now, nor have I ever been, an exotic dancer. I work at Home Depot and I told Sarah how hectic it was last week before the blizzard hit. I told her we sold out every single shovel we had. Then I found one more in the back room, and several people were fighting over who would get it. Sarah's picture does NOT show me dancing around a pole. It's supposed to depict me selling the last snow shovel we had at Home Depot. From now on I will remember to check her homework more thoroughly before she turns it in.

Eddie Van Halen Shreds.

2009-01-28T19:30:00.001-08:00

These videos kill me. There's other ones with other guitarists too. LOL

Don't forget the snacks

2009-01-08T14:15:00.001-08:00

As many know I'm helping out with some minor hockey coaching this year with my son's team. As part of being able to be behind the bench with the kids, I had to take some coaching clinics and courses. I have to say the stuff I learned in those sessions have been so valuable and eye opening to me - not only for coaching, but for life. Big thanks to Mike O'Pray for the great teaching.

Today Mike sent me a great article on that topic by Steve Simmons of the Toronto Sun that I just had to post. If anything for me to have to refer back to (often). But, I think you might enjoy it too... It really puts everything into perspective...

I Hope They Didn’t Bring Apple Juice

By Steve Simmons, Toronto Sun

There was about two minutes to play in the playoff game and I was anxiously pacing behind the

bench, barking out whatever instructions seemed important at that very moment. You watch the

game and you watch the clock in those final seconds, sometimes precisely at the very same time.

We were up by a goal, poised to advance to the next round of the playoffs, when I felt a tug on

my jacket. “Ah coach,” one of my players said on the bench. “Yea,” I answered, concentrating

more on the game and the clock than on him at that instance. “Is there snacks today?”

“Whaaaat?” I barked exasperated. “Did anyone bring snacks today?” “Huh,” I looked away. “I

hope they didn’t bring apple juice.” The young boy said. “I don’t like apple juice.”

The moment froze me in all the playoff excitement, the way all special and meaningful moments

should. If somehow, I could have captured that conversation on tape, I would have had one of

those special sporting moments for parents everywhere, the kind you need to play for coaches

and executive and trainers and managers and all of us who take kids hockey way too seriously. It

isn’t life or death, as we like to think it is. It isn’t do or die as often as we pretend it to be. In one

tiny moment in one game minor hockey was reduced to what it really is about. Apple juice. OK,

so it’s not apple juice. But what apple juice happens to represent in all of this. The snack. The

routine. The ritual. Kids can win and lose and not even give a second’s thought about either, but

don’t forget the post-game drinks. If anything will spoil a good time, that will. You see, it’s all

part of the culture of hockey. Not who wins, not who scores goals, not which team accomplished

what on which night, but about whether Mom and Dad are there, whether their grandparents are

in the stands watching, whether their best friend was on their team and they got a shift on the

power play, and yes, about what they ate.

When you get involved in hockey, when you truly put your heart into the game and into the

environment and into everything, it can be when it’s at its best, the game is only part of the

package. It becomes a social outing for parents. It becomes a social outing for children. It should

never be about who is going for extra power skating and who is going straight from minor tyke

to the Ottawa Senators but about building that kind of environment, the kind of memories kids

and parents and families will have forever.

Sometimes, when I stand around the arenas I can’t believe the tone of the conversations I hear.

The visions are so short-sighted. The conversations are almost always about today and who won

and who lost and who scored. Not enough people use the word fun and not enough sell it that

way either. Hard as we try to think like kids, we’re not kids. Hard as we try to remember what

we were when we were young, our vision is clouded by perspective and logic, something not

always evident with children. Ask any parent whether they would rather win or lose and without

a doubt they would say win. But ask most children what they would prefer: playing a regular

shift, with power play time and penalty killing time on a losing team rather playing sparingly on

a winning team, and the answer has already come out in two different studies. Overwhelmingly,

kids would rather play a lot than win and play a little. Like we said, it is about apple juice. It is,

after all, about the experience. You can’t know what’s in a kid’s mind.

I was coaching a team a few years ago when I got a call from the goaltender’s Father. It was the

day before the championship game. The Father told me his son didn’t want to play anymore.

“Anymore after tomorrow.” I asked. “No,” the Father said. “He just doesn’t want to play

anymore.” “Did something happen?” I asked. “He won’t tell me,” the Father said. I hung up the

phone and began to wonder how this happened and who would play goal the next day when I

decided to call back. “Can I talk to him?” I asked the father. The goalie came on the phone. “I

don’t want to play anymore.” “But you know what tomorrow is, don’t you? Are you nervous?”

“No.” “Then what? You can tell me.” “I don’t like it anymore.” “Don’t like playing goal?”

“They hurt me,” he said. “Who hurts you?” “The guys,” he said “What guys?” “Our guys. They

jump on me after the game. It hurts me and scares me.” “Is that it?” “Yea.” “Do you trust me?”

“Yea.” “What if I told you they won’t jump on you and hurt you anymore. Would you play

then?” “Are you sure?” “I’m sure.” “Then I’ll play.” And that was the end of the goalie crisis.

The kid was scared and wouldn’t tell his parents. The kid loved playing but didn’t love being

jumped on after winning games. You can’t anticipate anything like that as a coach. You can’t

anticipate what’s in their minds. It’s their game, we have to remember. Not our game. They don’t

think like we do or look at the sport like we do. They don’t have to adjust to us, we have to

adjust to them. We have to make certain we’re not spoiling their experience. Our experience is

important too, but the game is for the children and not for the adults. We can say that over and

over again, but the message seems to get lost every year. Lost in too many coaches who lose

perspective and who think nothing of blaming and yelling and bullying. Lost by parents who

think their son or daughter is the next this or the next that and they are already spending the

millions their little one will be earning by the time they finish hockey in the winter, 3-on-3 in the

summer, power skating over winter break, special lessons over March break, pre-tryout camp

before the AAA tryouts in May and a couple weeks of hockey school, just to make certain they

don’t go rusty. I have asked many NHL players how they grew up in the game. My favorite

answer came from Trevor Linden, who has captained more than one team. He said he played

hockey until April and then put his skates away. He played baseball all summer until the last

week of August. He went to hockey camp for one week then began his season midway through

September with tryouts. No Summer hockey. No special schools. No skating 12 months a year.

“I didn’t even see my skates for about five months a year. I think the kids today are playing way

too much hockey and all you have to do is look at the development to see it really isn’t

producing any better players. “We have to let the kids be kids.” When, I asked Gary Roberts

recently, did he think he had a future in hockey. “When I got a call from an agent before the

OHL draft,” he said. “Before that, it was just a game we played.” Do me a favor: Until the agent

comes knocking on your teenager’s door, let’s keep it that way. A game for kids.

And one reminder, I don’t care what the age: Don’t forget the snacks.

Steve Simmons writes a city column for the Toronto Sun when he isn’t coaching his Avenue Road

minor atom select team or Vaughan peewee house league team. His syndicated Sunday sports

column is the most read sports column in Canada.

"Be ashamed to die until you have won some victory for humanity"

2008-12-31T04:49:00.001-08:00

-Marian Edelman

Via: http://ffffound.com/image/54ca7b69d9bc7557a11d67347e6add16e48729d5

Cool Table

2008-12-30T13:56:00.001-08:00

Some neato photos

2008-12-29T08:10:00.001-08:00

Via: http://justcreativedesign.com/

Homer is eating my legs

2008-12-25T07:49:00.001-08:00

A gift from my daughter.

http://howto.wired.com/wiki/Fold_an_Origami_Millennium_Falcon

Origami: Millenium Falcon

2008-12-23T12:21:00.001-08:00

Via Wired:

Cutting Onions

2008-12-22T19:44:00.001-08:00

via: http://www.caglepost.com/cartoon/Frederick+Deligne/58970/Santa+Shoe.html

Funny:

2008-12-18T09:37:00.001-08:00

http://www.weirdomatic.com/funny-office-pranks.html

How to maintain your sanity

2008-12-17T13:58:00.001-08:00

- At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on. Point a hair dryer at passing cars. See If They Slow Down.

- Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

- Make some copies of a paperclip. Then put them into the paper tray of the copier. People will go nuts trying to find the paperclip stuck in the printer.

- Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

- Steal all the victim’s pens and replace them with pens that have the caps glued on.

- Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks... Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions,
switch to espresso.

- In the memo field of all your checks, write "For Marijuana"

- Find an old toy with button-activated sound (music, baby crying, etc.). Tape it to the back of the victim’s desk drawer, so that when the drawer is completely shut the button is activated. Leave the drawer open a crack, and wait for victim to arrive.

- Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

- Specify that Your drive-thru order is "To Go".

- When The money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won!"

- When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

- Pick up a box of condoms at the Pharmacy and while at the counter ask where the fitting room is.

- If the victim has a phone with a hook that presses down when the handset is in the cradle, tape it down. When he or she answers a call the phone will keep ringing.

- If you have an office phone system that allows conference calling, you can prank two people at once. Call the first victim’s extension, then very quickly call the second victim and push the conference button. Now both people will think the other person called them and will begin arguing over who called whom!

- Leave a phone message for the victim that says that a “Mr. Lyon” called (or Mr. Behr also works), and wants to be called back. Then list the phone number of the local zoo.

- Plug a radio into the power strip that your victim’s computer is plugged in to. Turn the volume all the way up. Now turn the power strip off. Your victim will at first be puzzled why their computer won’t turn on; and then will get a big surprise when they flip their power strip on.

- If the victim uses Microsoft Word, go into the victim’s computer and change the auto-correct feature so it misspells common words. Just open Word, choose “AutoCorrect Options” from the Tools menu, and have it replace common words like “the” and “and” with wacky words like “eggplant” or “Uranus.” Be creative.

Bush Farts

2008-12-16T10:42:00.001-08:00

Dave's tattoo

2008-12-14T17:13:00.001-08:00

While my bro was on his last tour in the Persian Gulf, he asked me to design him a tattoo. He wanted the initials of his wife and kids circling the globe to represent the fact that no matter where he is in the world, they are with him.

During a port visit to in Split, Croatia, he visited a local shop and had it inked.

Rough Sketch.

Cleaned up and coloured.

Proof of concept. (He told me he'd been working out a lot on the ship, so I wanted as close of a representation as possible)

Final Ink.

WalMart Bingo

2008-12-11T15:24:00.003-08:00

Return of the Jedi

2008-12-11T15:24:00.001-08:00

Max Mallard on CBC

2008-12-08T05:16:00.001-08:00

Here's @stephenbrander and his interview with Dave MacDonald on the CBC talking about all things Max Mallard - the Boy with Duck for Hands.

Download now or listen on posterous

Stephen-Brander-Max-Mallard-CBC.mp3 (6354 KB)

Your rights as a human

2008-11-17T10:30:00.001-08:00

Rebel Logo Making

2008-11-16T17:45:00.001-08:00

Today after this morning's game, my son's Atom hockey team (which I help coach) voted on their new name, the Riverview Rebels. Of course they're gonna need a cool logo to go with it. I love this type of stuff, so I secretly decided I'd do one up to surprise them. For fun, I thought it would be neat to document the process too (which I've never done before). From sketch to vector, choosing colours and typestyles, then applying it to some clothing - this is typically how it goes...

Final Logo:

I hope they like it.

Logo revised

2008-11-16T17:35:00.001-08:00

Rebel Logo Making

2008-11-15T20:52:00.001-08:00

Final Logo:

I hope they like it.

Welcome Home Dave!

2008-11-06T11:45:00.001-08:00

A picture taken by the Canadian Press after Dave arrived home from his six month mission in the Persian Gulf.

Yes we can

2008-11-05T14:47:00.001-08:00

One of those days

2008-11-04T14:25:00.001-08:00

Global Electoral College

2008-10-24T13:07:00.001-07:00

What would the U.S. election look like if the whole world could vote?

Here's a pretty staggering graphic from the Economist:

Go here and cast your own vote:
http://www.economist.com/vote2008/

via: http://www.flickr.com/photos/apelad/2965380675/

Old School Facebook

2008-10-24T12:42:00.001-07:00

Presidential Dance off

2008-10-24T09:27:00.001-07:00

Magnifique!

2008-10-16T09:33:00.001-07:00

Daily Show clip re: Canadian election. Hilarious!

Heck, we're just thrilled whenever American's acknowledge us. Good or bad.

Viral GOLD!

2008-10-15T08:17:00.001-07:00

Why is everyone in cohoots?

2008-10-10T11:25:00.001-07:00

On the Australian Liberal Party website (the Aussie Liberal party is ironically more aligned with our Canadian Conservative party), note the promotion of the different elections which are "coincidentally" happening all around the same time.
Not only are they promoting the elections, but they are promoting the specific parties.

http://www.liberal.org.au/

Don't Vote

2008-10-10T09:36:00.001-07:00

Sarah Silverman is awesome.

US Politics Train Metaphor

2008-10-10T09:23:00.001-07:00

Robot Supply Store

2008-10-10T08:51:00.000-07:00

Link

Sugary Meteor

2008-10-09T06:00:00.001-07:00

This huge hunk of compressed sugar fell out of a box of Frosted Flakes into my daughters cereal bowl this morning. As much as I'd like to eat it, I think it's better to save and possibly donate to science.

http://www.ndp.ca/xfer/campaign2008/Platform_2008_EN.pdf

Platform Design Platforms

2008-10-07T14:20:00.001-07:00

The Conservative party platform has finally been released and we can now officially weigh in on a very important issue: Platform Design Platforms. In an overwhelming majority, Adobe InDesign wins the Canadian Political Party Design Platform Election. The Liberals and the NDP lead the way both using InDesign, although the NDP gets extra points for having their software up to date (v.5.0.3). The Conservative Platform was created in CorelDRAW (Form "L" shape with thumb and index finger and hold up to forehead), while the Green Party used Microsoft Word (I don't understand it, but I'm sure there's some environmental implications in doing so, so who can criticize?).

In the end, the real loser in all this is once again Quark.

NDP Platform:

Liberal Platform:

http://www.liberal.ca/pdf/platform/2008lp_action_plan_e.pdf

Conservative Platform:

http://www.conservative.ca//media/20081007-Platform-e.pdf

Green Party Platform:

http://greenparty.ca/files/VisionGreen.pdf

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Now that we've gotten that important issue out of the way, I say with less than a week left to go, you owe it to yourself to do these two things:

1. Educate and inform yourself.

Download and read these. Don't simply use what you hear in the crappy media as your guide to making your decision. Ok, the Green platform is a little dry. I skimmed most of it. But there really is a lot of interesting stuff in all of these platforms that you probably haven't heard before. If there was ever a time to get informed and involved, it's now. With the economy and the environment both on the verge of collapse, there has never been a time when choosing the right leadership was more important.

2. On Tuesday October 14th - VOTE!

It's your right. Use it!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

iPhone App Coasters

2008-10-01T13:16:00.001-07:00

Elton John Concert

2008-09-29T07:21:00.001-07:00

An incredible show!

Apparently they weren't as vigilant with video cameras in Halifax
(I got busted in Moncton) Here's some good vids from their show:

Slow Motion Boxing

2008-09-29T04:44:00.001-07:00

I found this video on Youtube. As cool as it was, I thought it could be better if it has some music added... here's the result.

Electronic Cigarettes: Alien Technology?

2008-09-25T14:01:00.001-07:00

This is so cool, I think I may take up smoking! This could be how we bring back the PIPE!!

Love how the LED lights up when you take a drag! GENIUS!

Website: http://www.theelectroniccigarette.co.uk/shop/default.asp

Food Art

2008-09-25T05:41:00.001-07:00

Think Pink

2008-09-18T13:45:00.001-07:00

As part of "Think Pink Week" here in Moncton, the folks at City Hall took things to a whole 'nother level...

Pink Water in the water fountain (not a camera trick... this is really pink water!)... yum. If I drink it, does it taste like Hubba Bubba?

And of course the pink tutu'ed deer. Also note that drinking the pink water causes the deer to make pink doo-doo.

Chillout

2008-09-18T10:59:00.001-07:00

A timely song by zefrank (and friends)...

A couple days ago, zefrank put out the request to have a few people submit their voices to a simple song he made to help Laura chill out in anxious times. After he had about 20 volunteers, he mixed it all together for our listening pleasure.

Chillout3 by Ze Frank
Download now or listen on posterous

chillout_.mp3 (2607 KB)

http://www.zefrank.com/zesblog/archives/2008/09/childrens_songs.html

I'm feeling better already! Once again, ze makes me smile (thank you). Can't wait for him to do more.